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i've been going to bed early after taking my medicine, and lately i've been waking up at around 4 in the morning. part of it has to do with my cat screaming at me to feed her, but i thihnk i've just been having pretty rough dreams. my anxiety has been pretty bad lately too, and it doesn't help that my surgery is next month (october 13 or 14). i have no idea what recovery will look like. i've been messing with javascript also and i finally got around to adding a dark mode. i personally don't need it but a lot of people do so i figured why not make it? anyways shorter entry since i'm going to keep working on my site.

it's been a little while since i updated my neocities. i really need to try and get back into it, since i've been pretty hyperfixated on toyhouse codes and html. css is a bit difficult and i'm still getting used to. i've just been kind of out of it with anything social. my brain just feels kind of static, and i've been really wanting to write more long blog posts like i used to on dreamwidth.

which speaking of, i've been writing again! i finally edited through my orphsephrick fic someone to hate, and now i'm working on chapter five of my nortseph fic side effects. i actually started rewriting the fifth chapter since i wasn't too pleased with how it felt like lore-dumping rather than progressing my story. right now i'm trying to figure out how to work with the current mystery, like who norton's "supplier" is, why mike is so protective of norton, and maybe even something unusual going on with frederick.

i've been listening to penguinz0 while i write and i've been kind of anxious about censorship lately. this might be a little more personal, but i told both my mom and my primary doctor that i genuinely suspect that i might have some form of OCD, and i don't think it's fair to call it "just autism." but my doctor did bring up a medication change, so i might as well put the OCD suspicions on the side for now. i just don't think that obsessing over something like obscenity laws and censorship for three weeks in a row is really a symptom of autism, though i understand why someone might think that, but i'm honestly not sure.

anyway i might post a small snippet of chapter five, which you can find some previews of my works on my dreamwidth!

i'm proud of the progress i've made so far!

made some progress on my site. i already posted enough on my dreamwidth, but to recap, i'm going to try and use this site more often and sporatically update from time to time. i don't know what i'll do entirely just yet but for now i'll figure things out.